Ever sat in Mass, looking up at the statues of the apostles and the Virgin and thought, "Mmm, that sure does make me hungry!"  Well, neither have I, and unless you've been in a plane crash in the Andes, you probably have not, either. 

But you might feel differently, after reading about a miraculous appearance of the Virgin in a block of chocolate. 

At Bodega Chocolates, a gourmet chocolate company in Fountain Valley, California that caters to the calorie needs of the rich and famous, worker Cruz Jacinto was cleaning up the chocolate droppings off the floor, when she noticed the two inch tall clump that looked like you-know-who.

"When I come in, the first thing I do is look at the clock, but this time I didn't look at the clock. My eyes went directly to the chocolate," said Jacinto. "I thought, 'Am I the only one who can see this? I picked it up and I felt emotion just come over me. For me, it was a sign." 

She goes on to say that she was losing her faith because of unspecified marital problems, and seeing this lump of chocolate changed everything.  "I have big problems right now, personally, and lately I've been saying that God doesn't exist," she said. "This has given me renewed faith." 

 I always wonder about people who see the Virgin showing up in a chunk of sheetrock or a tortilla, or in this case, chocolate.  They always interpret the image as a divine revelation, but they never consider the object that She chose to appear in.  In other words, they never ask "Why a tortilla?"  or "Why chocolate?"  These people separate the medium from the message.  What was Mary trying to say by appearing in chocolate instead of, say, a Cheez-It?  Is the Virgin saying that we are too thin and need more meat on our bones?  Or we are lacking in antioxidants?  Or maybe it is a test?  Can you venerate me, even if eating me might spoil your dinner?

Cruz Jacinto  doesn't seem to care.  Apparently employees at the chocolate shop have started praying to the lump and lighting candles for it. 

Anyway, to me, this is not a sign from the Virgin. 

It is a sign from Humphrey Bogart, demanding a Criterion rerelease of the Maltese Falcon on DVD.

 Judge for yourself.  Find the original article here.